THE TEARS OF A CLOWN

Well, it's official. I've been waiting a long, long time for something like this to happen and now that it looks like it's in the making, all I can say is, "It's about bloody time!" The late Keith Moon of the Who (pictured on the right) is finally getting an entire biopic all to his crazed, hotel-trashing, drumkit smashing, deeply sweet, funny, often triumphant, sometimes abusive, ultimately pathetic self. There have been thousands of drummers in thousands of bands (rock, jazz, you name it) over the years, and while we generally admire the techincal prowess of practiced percussionsts, there was only one (okay, two if you count Ringo) whose great talent was that they made the drums sound funny. On a technical level, Moon was, well, completely non-technical. Maniac is the word most often used to describe him as a drummer. He, basically, played whatever he wanted and let the rest of the band make sense of it. But, in those tumbling rolls of thunder and lightning cymbal crashes, a great comedian was at work. I still marvel at the way he follows Pete Towshend's lyric "If I swallow anything evil/put your finger down my throat" with a gurgle-gurgle-gurgle across his drums which - I swear - mimics the sound of someone swallowing. He was equally as fun and fascinating to watch as he was on record. Whereas other drummers show off by tossing their sticks into the air and catching them in a variety of smooth, slick ways, Moon would throw the audience by hurling his sticks into the ether, allowing them to clatter to the floor, then pumping his fist in mock-disappointment; "Damn! I missed!" . Of course, there were times when he really was too out-of-it to catch the sticks, but that's part of his pathos, I guess.
So, with his antics in mind, it's appropriate, I think, that the actor cast to play him is, in fact, a comedian. I had always imagined Mike Myers (shown left, above) as a good candidate to play Moon the Loon (as Keith was known) ever since I saw him in Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery. Apparently, Roger Daltrey, the Who's lead singer, felt the same way and is now producing a movie featuring Myers in the role of rock's funniest, saddest percussionist. Daltrey, known for his swaggering, macho image is famed for the theatrics of twirling his microphone on the end of its cord while strutting around the stage in a display of alpha-masculinity. Moon used to joke that the only reason Roger spun his mike around that way was to fend off the rotten eggs and tomatoes thrown by the people who didn't like his singing.
I'm a bit concerned that Myers might concentrate his portrayl of Moon too much on the crazy, hotel destroying side of the drummer's personality. Keith was also a very funny, sad, and intriguing man. He once gave away his treasured gold plated cigarette lighter (presented to him by Jimi Hendrix) to a bum who was admiring it. Moon must have thought "There but for the grace of God, and the Who, go I". On another occasion, the Who played a show that feaured some of rock's heavier acts as well as, mysteriously, the lightweight folkie, Melanie. The poor girl was mercilessly booed and abused by the rowdy rock 'n' roll crowd. She wept miserably backstage, despite everyone's attempts to cheer her up. But when Keith appeared, dressed up as giant bumble bee, all he had to do was stand there and say "bzzzz", and poor Melanie started laughing hysterically.
Of course, Moon's antics weren't always endearing. Once, when John Lennon and Yoko Ono were having a quiet dinner together at a posh London resaurant, Keith made a grand entrance. Spotting the performance-artist and the Beatle, he leapt onto their table, and began an impromtu striptease. Lennon glared at him, murderously, and with Yoko, beat a hasty retreat out the door. Guitarist Jeff Beck remembers spending a bizarre weekend at Keith's remote estate where Moon took him for a near-suicidal ride in his private hovercraft. Adjourning to the bathroom to vomit, Beck was surprised to find a young woman huddled in a corner. She ran to him, embraced him and begged, "Please take me away with you when you leave. Get me out of here. That guy is crazy!"
Apparently, if Keith Moon had been a geographical location, he would have been a fun place to visit, but a terrible place to live.
It should also be noted that all three of the other members of the Who were known to have belted, smacked, punched, cold-cocked, and poleaxed Keith any number of times. He was brilliantly, maniacally hyperactive and spent a lot of time seeing psychiatrists. His long-suffering ex-wife Kim said, "He ate them alive." She also said that when he wasn't drunk or on drugs, he was a sweet, sensitive, witty, and loveable man. It was only when he started partying, which was most of the time, that "all these other Keiths would come out. He wore so many masks, I never knew who he would be from one minute to the next."
In 1978, Keith tried to clean up his act. Roger Daltrey forced him to go to a health farm. And Keith began taking medicine to combat his alcoholism. On a September night, after a dinner date with Paul and Linda McCartney, Moon died, ironically, of an overdose of the drug that might have saved him. He passed away in the same flat (and even the very same bed) where Mama Cass Elliot had died some years before.
He was only 32 years old. Mike Myers is currently 42.
After writing this, I'm starting to wonder why I should be interested in such a weird, tragic life. I guess there's just this feeling that, while he was alive, he seemed invincible. At least he thought so, as did a lot of the hangers-on and sycophants who reveled in his self-destruction. It's a sad story, and he was nobody's role model. Just a crazy bloke. But somewhere, in my mind's eye, I still see the Who in all their old, forgotten glory, exploding in fire and light, challenging the powers that be, while mad Moon attacks his massive battery of drums with the energy and conviction of a fanatic.


Jim Henson created the character "Animal", the wild and crazy puppet who plays drums for the Muppet band, based on Moon the Loon.

The Monty Python movie, "The Life of Brian", is dedicated to Keith Moon.

Keith invented the name Led Zeppelin.

TODAY'S QUOTE:
"The lunatic, the lover, and the poet
Are of imagination all compact."
--- Shakespeare