VANITY FAIRNESS

You have every right to feel anger and to confront whichever insensitive goons you suspect have been giving you the runaround or causing you grief. But you need to be able to use your head and express frustration appropriately, in ways that will advance your cause, not create more enmity or alienation. The fixed cross of Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn in your solar angular houses (blah, blah, blah) can release enormous reserves of energy, which when channeled into your career could produce miracles. Flailing about in blind rages only gives you excess stomach acid.
--- My Monthly Horoscope in Vanity Fair

My situation at work has improved due to the lovely lady pictured below. Her name is Debbie. She stocks gift cards for all the Borders in the area. I convinced her to get her son to volunteer to play Harry Potter at our book release party, in July of last year. He was a very nice, bright young man, and he did a great job as ol' Scarhead, the wizard prodigy. Anyway, I have won Debbie's favor during our time working together; so much so that she wanted to set me up with her eighteen year old daughter! I hated to tell her how old I really was (maybe I should've lied!), but I was flattered by the offer. To make a long story short, when she was at Nancy (our new manager)'s store, stocking cards, Debbie spent a good half hour (she says) telling Nancy good things about me. She says it's only fair, and that I deserve it. I love you, Debbie! You're the greatest! Also, Nancy's old store is not closing down, as was recently rumored, and so her old employees will not be migrating over to our location to take our jobs...

A word of caution, though: I don't know how much Jerry S. will back me up on this. He recently told me that I am quote "not a detail oriented person", but that he had no reservations about my customer service skills (an area in which he says I'm the ideal employee).

Incidentally, there are so many other options and possibilites opening up for me every day that, even if I don't get Jerry's job come June, there are better things out there.

(P.S. The Lockhart Chronicles can still be accessed via the link to the right.)

Debbie & Dobby.

(I was going to use a picture of Debbie with her son and call it

"Debbie, Harry".

But no such photo exists.

Fans of new wave music will get that joke.)